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In lands I never saw -- they say
Immortal Alps look down --
Whose bonnets touch the firmament --
Whose sandals touch the town --

Meek at whose everlasting feet
A myriad daisy play --
Which, Sir, are you and which am I
Upon an August day?

Emily Dickinson
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Do you forgive ? if yes , Do you do that quickly ?

snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well. Forgiveness is different from condoning (failing to see the action as wrong and in need of forgiveness), excusing (not holding the offender as responsible for the action), pardoning (granted by a representative of society, such as a judge), forgetting (removing awareness of the offense from consciousness), and reconciliation (restoration of a relationship).

What is forgivness for you ? share you experience or give any advise !
@Lynne @april @christelle @mheredge @Zom @NatashaT @nisreen.mustafa @bubbli @Just-Learn

Comments

  • Just-LearnJust-Learn Posts: 473 ✭✭✭✭
    I forgive if an honest apology has been given! and if people admit their mistakes and say sorry, it doesn't take time with me in that case. Sometimes, I come over it even if they don't apologize but never forget. at the end, there is no rules for forgiveness, each case differ from another.

    And if I did a mistake I apologize easily and try to do more than just an apology.
  • BubblyBubbly Nightingale Posts: 30,050 ✭✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2015
    Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. I believe in this quote. Because, without forgiveness we can't move on in life and we constantly involve in ill thoughts to take revenge. Forgiveness always gives peace of mind and I really observed it in my life.
  • ZomZom Shadok Posts: 2,746 ✭✭✭✭✭✭
    It's hard to say anything about it; I don't remember the last time, I felt offended.
    It befits a man to be merry and glad
    Until the day of his death.
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2015
    @Just-Learn sometimes It's hard to ask apology and sometimes it's to late to do it !!
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2015
    How forgiveness can be a gift for yourself? maybe for the person how did the mistake @bubbli !
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    I can suppose that you forgive quickly @Zom if you don't remember !
  • BubblyBubbly Nightingale Posts: 30,050 ✭✭✭✭✭✭
    @snack98 very simple. You get detached of lingering thoughts that keep you busy to have ill thoughts about that person or provoke you to take revenge.
  • christellechristelle Posts: 984 ✭✭✭✭✭
    I forgive easily in general. It is said :
    "Errare humanum est ... sed persavare diabolicum."
    It means : to err is human ... but to persevere is diabolical.

    Everybody do mistakes, we should be tolerant towards the others.

    ErrHuman.ForgiveDivine-178x100.jpg

    I believe each person has in himself a divine part. So ...

    C1B139540B018ACE45DD06EF5AA60.jpg

  • christellechristelle Posts: 984 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2015
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    You show me that you really believe that we have to forgive
    very nice @christelle , if all around world think with this logic it's the end of wars and conflect
  • ZomZom Shadok Posts: 2,746 ✭✭✭✭✭✭
    Or maybe I've started to develop a thicker skin @snack98.
    It befits a man to be merry and glad
    Until the day of his death.
  • mcc15mcc15 Posts: 79 ✭✭
    @snack98 It might look like the person you forgave is the one who benefits. But I believe in @Bubbly's words. In the end it's something which let you move on when you stop sticking to negative feelings.
    I experienced that forgivness doesn't have to mean that things go back to normal routine. Maybe you never talk again to the person you just forgave but something inside of you is "ok with it". It's really hard to explain for me ...:)
  • RafiaremaRafiarema Posts: 369 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2015
    I forgive others mistakes, hopefully my mistakes would be forgiven too.
    Sometimes I forgive It quickle, sometimes I forgive a little longer. I am just a human being.
  • mheredgemheredge Teacher Here and therePosts: 26,514 mod
    I'm happy to forgive, but this doesn't mean I have to forget.
  • GulmiraGulmira Posts: 41 ✭✭
    edited October 2015
    I always try to forgive, sometimes this happens easily, sometimes, even if I think that I have forgiven, somewhere inside of me, I know, I haven't - the pain is still there....

    I totally agree with @Bubbly, "forgiveness is a gift, you give for yourself". Moreover,
    I believe, we have to learn to forgive, because something that another person does or says is "offensive" only because we think so. I mean we don't know what the person has had in his mind on that particular moment, what kind of "story" he has behind of him... Our assumptions make us think that he has offended us... in reality it might be that he has not had this intention. Or even if he has done it on purpose, then he is the person who, most of all, needs forgiveness and love, because he is unhappy, as, in my opinion, happy people don't offend other people.

    Another question: what is forgiveness? is it just to say to another person: "it is ok, you are forgiven".
  • RafiaremaRafiarema Posts: 369 ✭✭✭
    @gulmira Right! lets be a big heart person. ^^
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    @mheredge How to forgive without to forget ?????
  • mheredgemheredge Teacher Here and therePosts: 26,514 mod
    Well you can not be angry, you can accept the person did you some harm but not let it affect your relationship. That's forgiveness @snack98. But unless it's something trivial, it doesn't mean that you necessarily dismiss it as never happening. You just don't let it take control and change how you get along with that person. Does this make more sense to you?
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    yes of course ! thank you for more details our aim is to develop discussion . It's alright ! @mheredge
  • mheredgemheredge Teacher Here and therePosts: 26,514 mod
    I was very annoyed with my neighbour who had locked an outer door even though I'd expressly told him it needed to be left open so a plumber could gain access to the area to fix a leak. I've forgiven him, but I'm not going to forget that he can't be relied on to keep the door open.
  • snack98snack98 Posts: 247 ✭✭✭
    but sure that he did it not in purpose
  • mheredgemheredge Teacher Here and therePosts: 26,514 mod
    I hope not. I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt @snack98. Though my friend is inclined to think it's deliberate.
  • KhaliedKhalied EgyptPosts: 2,223 ✭✭✭✭✭
    yeah I forgive sometime but i'm humanity i can't forgive everything .
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